| 1 | Introduction | Vitamin String Quartet | 0:40 |
| 2 | The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide Is Press Coverage | Vitamin String Quartet | 2:53 |
| 3 | I Write Sins Not Tragedies | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:06 |
| 4 | There’s a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven’t Thought of It Yet | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:25 |
| 5 | Time to Dance | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:27 |
| 6 | Intermission | Vitamin String Quartet | 2:51 |
| 7 | London Beckoned Songs About Money Written by Machines | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:26 |
| 8 | Camisado | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:22 |
| 9 | Lying Is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:10 |
| 10 | But It’s Better If You Do | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:19 |
| 11 | Build God, Then We’ll Talk | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:41 |
| 12 | Nails for Breakfast, Tacks for Snacks | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:30 |
| 13 | I Constantly Thank God for Esteban | Vitamin String Quartet | 3:41 |